1. Your Smile
Does it seem sweet and genuine? Does it seem awkward and forced? Does it seem like you ate a sesame-seed and parsley salad for lunch based on what’s lodged between every single one of your teeth?
2. Your Hair
Guys have no idea what split ends are, and if you mention roots, they just think of the band. But they do look to see if your hair looks 1. soft and 2. as though it would smell good. So don’t request “The Gosselin” at the salon, and wash it every so often. That’s all guys ask.
3. Your Cleavage
Newsflash: Dudes like to look at your chest. Now, that’s not to say they think all women should unbutton their shirts to their bellybuttons at funerals. (Though really, who are guys to judge?) But they will notice how you’re showing off what you’ve got.
4. Your Makeup
If you’re wearing so much makeup that it looks like you’ve painted an entirely new face on top of your actual face, guys will wonder if you’re trying to cover up some bizarre deformation — or if you’re Gotham City’s most dangerous criminal mastermind.
5. Your Skin
You know that blemish you’ve been obsessing over all day because it’s so huge? Chances are guys won’t even notice. What will they notice? If you look like a jaundiced Oompa-Loompa because of overenthusiastic tanning.
6. Your Bag
Are all women who haul around big purses — in other words, cavernous rucksacks stuffed full of old receipts, emergency sweaters, and half-used bottles of hand sanitizer — high maintenance? Maybe not. But guys will go ahead and assume they are anyway.
Alon
